Saturday, January 5, 2013

Loose New Year's Goals

Now that the new year is here, I have some goals for myself. I'm not making resolutions this year because I feel like they sound like things that have to happen overnight and years of trying for dramatic change instantly has shown me that it doesn't work.

Knitting: I have several WIPs to finish up in the coming months. I recently (finally!) took pictures of all of my yarn from the last two yarn crawls and am slowly working on getting it plugged into my stash. I’m sure some of my yarn will get moved to trade/sell as well.

I’d like to make more drool sweaters for Hannah as well as finish the sweater for myself that I started over break. I am in love with cowls this year, so I have plans for another one of those as well. I’m hoping to knit as much from stash as possible so I feel less guilty about buying yarn at the yarn crawl in August. I’d also just like my kid to have tons of knitted stuff!

Health: My goal is to be healthier this year. For the first time in ages, I am not going to try to lose weight. I do think that if I stick with a healthier lifestyle, I will lose weight. I just want to make gradual habit changes. So every few weeks I'll pick a new goal to add.

My goal for the first few weeks is to drink more water/fluids. My plan is have 12-16 ounces of coffee or tea by 10AM, 32 ounces of water by 4PM, and at least 16 ounces before bed. That's between 60-64 ounces a day which is a pretty good. Most of this is going to be water. Any other beverages need to be after 4PM and I need to finish the first 44-48 ounces first. At work, I think this is going to be easy to keep on top of. It's at home that I usually struggle, especially weekends. All of this is going to be pretty flexible since it's rigidity that usually trips me up. There will be occasions when I have pop, and beyond limiting myself to no more than one a day, I'm not going to attempt to control my Starbucks consumption. Starbucks is more of a monetary concern than a dietary one, at least to me.

Personal stuff: I'd like to get better at balance. I think I'm doing a good job (even when I don't feel like it) being a mom and also as a teacher. My struggle is finding the balance between working, being a mom, being a wife, and being ME.

Finding time for things to keep me sane, namely knitting, is challenging. I have my knitting night, but other than that, there isn't much knitting going on right now. It hasn't always been this way; sleep is rough for Hannah right now, so I know it will get better. It's still a rough situation though right now. I also tend to feel guilty if I'm not holding her or playing with her or doing something with her when I'm home and she's awake. Since I'm gone all day, I don't get to spend the time with her and Matt spends all of his time with her. In my head, that means I should be spending as much time as possible with her in the evening. Unfortunately, that means no time for me which makes me irritable. As her sleep habits improve, I think this situation will work itself out.

I am also seeing that keeping the spark in our marriage is getting tougher. I'm not saying that we're falling apart or anything drastic; we're just getting in a rut. I don't like it. We need to spend more time together, even if we're just at home. Less electronics, more snuggles. Even if we're both on the computer, but sitting on the same couch. Sadly, that would be an improvement over where we are now. I come home from work and tell Matt about my day. He tells me about their day. Then we are completely focused on Hannah. Sometimes we'll go out to dinner and then we'll have conversations like we used to, but that's not a new problem. We've always talked more when we go out than we do when we eat at home. I think that's part of our issue with cooking. It's easier to talk when no one is stressed out about the food.

We also need to figure out how to get out of the house more without spending a ton of money. Babysitters are expensive and at this point, she's mostly luggage so I don't mind taking her places with us. Once she's mobile, then we'll start talking about getting a babysitter. I don't mind leaving her with my mom so we can see a movie, but beyond that, I just can't justify the expense of going out AND getting a sitter. It's pretty chilly for the zoo, so we need to find other alternatives even if it's just wandering around the mall and picking up Starbucks.

School: I need to finish my thesis.

I want to just be better at whatever it is I'm trying to do.

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